Precious and Fragile Things
by andrea-88
Summary: Sirius returns from the beyond the veil, but paid a price. Will he be able to overcome this? Will Remus remain at his side? Can their love survive? Slash SBRL other character show up too.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Precious & Fragile Things (1/6)  
**Author:** Andrea88  
**Rating:** R for the general theme and perhaps for sex as well  
**Pairing:** Sirius & Remus  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, JKR's  
**Summery:** Sirius returns from the beyond the veil, but paid a price. Will he be able to overcome this? Will Remus remain at his side? Can their love survive? Slash SB/RL other character show up too.  
**Warnings:** It maybe angsty, It maybe icky. Some won't be pretty. **Spoilers for Half Blood Price** **  
**

**_We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.  
Oscar Wilde_** **  
**

**Precious & Fragile Things Chapter One  
**

Remus walked towards the dais. The chamber was dark and empty. The black tattered curtain, fluttering in a non existent breeze was all that could be heard. Visions overwhelmed him, visions of Death Eaters, spells flying everywhere, and falling. Sirius falling burned in his memory. The shocked expression, the helplessness, he replayed the events over and over again in his head. What ifs consumed him, and refused him peace.

Remus sat down by the archway. The stone was cold, but he hadn't the mind to care. He reached out and touched his bane. His fingers brushing along the rough stone, tracing the runes etched there, reaching out to feel the fabric, tempting fate.

He didn't care what the consequences would be. He felt as cold and empty as the room. The past year without Sirius was indeed hell. No one mourned openly, no services were held. Fire whiskey was his only solace. Harry was the only reason he went back to work for the Order. He had made a vow to Sirius that he would look after Harry. Remus was a man of his word.

He threw himself into his work. Remus went underground to live among the werewolves, trying to recruit them, and seeing Fenrir only made his grief intensify. But he had to be strong – it's what he did. Then was the matter of Nymphadora. The thought alone made his head ache. He liked Tonks, found her pleasant company, but that was it. They had one night of shared drunken grief, and she thinks its love.

He tried to let her down easily, but she couldn't take a hint. Well, Remus wasn't very forthcoming with the real reason either. After the incident in the hospital wing, he sat her down, in private, and set her straight. At least he thought he had, at Dumbledore's funeral she was sporting pink hair. However inappropriate it may have been, it was at least a sign that she was 'over him'. As soon as he felt her hand take hold of his, he knew just how wrong he was.

Remus couldn't take it any more. He just wanted to be with Sirius again, he didn't care how. Leaning his head against the archway, Remus cried.

The veil whipped back and forth, as if caught in a violent storm. Remus' nails dug into the stone, his sobs drowning out the murmur of voices…

"Remus," the voice was hoarse.

Remus ignored the voice. It was just his mind playing tricks on him. This is what he told himself, until the scent filled him. It was distinctly Sirius. How many times had he let himself drown in that aroma? His eyes flew open.

Sirius looked the same as when he fell. He was lying on the stone floor in front of the veil. Remus did not need to question, he _knew_ this was Sirius. Sirius opened his mouth to say something, but was promptly smothered by Remus.

Remus had so many questions to ask Sirius, but he simply caught his face in both hands, and kissed him. Sirius let out a half-sob, half-moan, and his hands tightened their hold on Remus' waist. For a few moments Remus thought he was dreaming again. He was lost in the scent, and warmth of his lover. All he could see or breathe was Sirius.

"How," Remus asked as he reluctantly pulled away from another kiss.

"I don't really know. One moment I was dueling Bella, and the next I am in a dark, cold place. It reminded me slightly of my cell. I saw no one, but I kept hearing voices." Sirius paused for a moment, stared into Remus' eyes, as to reassure himself he really had returned. "They were angry, kept saying I didn't belong, I wasn't dead, that I was desecrating their sanctuary. I was to have retribution." Sirius trembled as he spoke.

"Shh, it's ok luv." Remus held Sirius tightly. "Let's go home. We can talk about this tomorrow." He stood up, straightened his robe, and wiped the tears from his eyes. He closed his eyes and thanked Merlin for Sirius' return.

"Remus, I can't move my legs," Sirius' voice was suddenly overcome with fear.

Sirius struggled to move his legs. They were nothing but dead weight.

Remus held him close and apparated to the one person he thought could help.


	2. Chapter 2

**Title:** Precious & Fragile Things - Chapter Two  
**Author:** Andrea88  
**Rating:** R for the general theme and perhaps for sex as well  
**Pairing:** Sirius & Remus  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, JKR's  
**Summery:** Sirius returns from the beyond the veil, but paid a price.  
**Warnings:** It maybe angsty, It maybe icky. Some won't be pretty. **Spoilers for Half Blood Price **

**Precious & Fragile Things **

**Chapter Two  
**

"_**In reality, hope is the worst of all evils, because it prolongs man's torments."**_

_**Friedrich Nietzsche**_

"Madam Pomfrey," Remus shouted as soon as he and Sirius apparated into the hospital wing at Hogwarts.

"What's going on out here," Pomfrey asked as she stepped out of her office. "Remus, what in Merlin's name are you doing here?"   
Her eyes widened as she saw the burden he was carrying, and rushed over, "how?"

"Hello Poppy, you look lovely as ever." Sirius said as if it were completely normal for him to be standing in front of her.

"Poppy, it's a long story, but Sirius has returned. However, he can not move his legs." Remus stated as he hauled Sirius to the nearest bed.   
"Just give me some foul brew, and I'll be good as new." Sirius' demeanor was calm he knew he was in good hands. Madam Pomfrey had always taken such good care of Remus after his transformations. He had no reason to doubt her healing abilities.

"I'll do what I can Sirius, but first I need to examine you." She proceeded to pull the curtains around the bed. "Remus can you lock the door, I do not wish to be disturbed during this."

Remus went to lock the door, thankful that the hospital wing wasn't filled with inquisitive spectators. He needed to get Sirius taken care of first, and then they could deal with the others. He wasn't looking forward to that, but with Sirius by his side, he could face anything.

"Remus, would you mind helping Sirius into a hospital gown, I'll be in my office getting supplies."

"Come on Moony, help undress me." Sirius raised his eyebrows suggestively, and pulled the blanket back to allow access.

Remus felt his cheeks flush as he noticed the smile on Pomfrey's face.

Poppy smiled as she entered her office. Sirius was just as she remembered him, and he could still make Remus turn scarlet at the drop of a hat. They were such a sweet couple. She had seen their bond while they were in school. It had broken her heart to hear of Sirius' betrayal, she had worried about Remus. It was a relief to find out that Sirius was innocent, and even twelve years in Azkaban could not tear them apart. They had been through so much, and yet always managed to get back to each other.

As she returned to Sirius' bed, she was treated to the sight of Remus being snogged thoroughly. She cleared her throat, causing Remus to fly off the bed and Sirius to bark with laughter. Some things never change.

Remus sat next to the bed, and held Sirius' hand as Pomfrey examined Sirius. Poppy was muttering to herself as she cast several spells. A look of utmost concentration was on her face.

"Sirius, tell me when you can feel something." She proceeded to lightly stick Sirius with a pin, starting from his toes and working her way up.

"Ouch! Be careful with that." He saw Poppy's look of concern and turned to see Remus mirroring the same expression. This couldn't be good. The sensation had been about an inch above his belly button.

Madam Pomfrey handed Sirius a glass filled with bright green liquid. "Drink this Sirius, it will help you sleep. I need to do a more intensive examination, and it will be easier if you are not awake for it."

Sirius hesitated and looked at Remus, "it will be ok Sirius. I will be right here." Remus gripped Sirius' hand tighter as an affirmation.

Sirius drank the foul liquid. With in a minute he was fast asleep.

Remus left Madam Pomfrey to her work and headed for the kitchens. A late night snack may be just what he needed. It had been a rollercoaster of a day. He reached the painting and tickled the pear. All the times he had done this flashed before him, memories of the various Marauders sneaking in. Times were so much simpler then.

Remus entered the kitchens and was promptly surrounded by various house elves. He was so busy addressing the house elves, that he did not notice the kitchen's other occupant.

"Remus, what brings you here at this hour? Is something wrong?" Minerva asked, setting her tea cup down with a bit more force than necessary.

"Hello Minerva, I stopped by to see Poppy." He smiled warmly, he rather she didn't find out why he was here yet.

"Sit down and have a cup of tea with me." She eyed Remus quizzically. There was more to this story, and she was intent on finding out.

Remus didn't have a choice he had to sit with Minerva. If he left now, she would become suspicious. A little idle chit chat and he could take his leave, and get back to Sirius.

"It's odd being back in the kitchens after all these years." Remus sat down across from Minerva. A house elf brought him a cup of tea.

"Yes, I can imagine it is strange for you after all this time. It's so quiet and I keep expecting him to show up and ask me if I want a lemon drop." She started at her tea, trying to mask the sadness in her voice.

"I am sorry it has to be hard on you right now."

"Yes, well one has to do what one must. So is Tonks with you?" A smile crossed her lips, as she looked at Remus.

"No, she isn't, nor will she ever i be /i with me." Tea sloshed out of the cup as he stirred with a little more fervor.

"I am sorry Remus, I just do not understand why you keep pushing her away. She is a very nice woman, even if she is a bit unsteady on her feet."

"Minerva, I will say this once, and once only, Tonks is not right for me." Finishing off the rest of the tea, he stood up and made to leave. "It's been a pleasure Minerva, and I hope to see you again soon."

She watched Remus leave and knew there was something strange going on. She could not think of a reason why Remus would be here, in the middle of the night, talking to Poppy. Her fingers drummed against the table as she drank her tea.

Remus entered the hospital wing and walked over to Sirius' bed. He was startled by what he saw. Sirius was still in a deep sleep, but the catheter hanging from the side of the bed worried him.

"I am sorry Remus. I have done every test, and tried every remedy I could think of, but nothing is helping." Her voice was soft and soothing. "I have not given up, but until then he will not have feeling, or use in the lower half of his body." She took a deep breath, "he will have to learn how to function, but I have every confidence he will be able to."

Remus took in this information and sank into the nearest chair. He looked over at his lover and how peaceful he looked. It didn't look like anything was wrong. His vision focused on the bright yellow fluid dripping into a bag. Sirius was not going to take this news well at all. As far as Remus was concerned, he was just happy to have Sirius back. Personally, he could care less about this, Sirius had come back. Granted, it would have been better if nothing was wrong, but it could have been so much worse.

The tabby cat hid amongst the shadows. She watched as Poppy explained the necessary things to Remus. Poppy handed Remus an extra pair of pajamas. The tabby turned her head as Remus changed, but smirked, if it was possible for cats to do such a thing, when Remus crawled into bed and held Sirius close. The tabby tilted its head, this explained i a _lot._

Sirius woke to find Remus' arms wrapped around him. He couldn't help but grin. He never thought he would see Remus again. Sirius placed a gentle kiss on Remus' forehead causing him to wake. Sirius loved watching Remus wake. He thought it was the most adorable thing in the world.

"Morning luv, did you sleep well?"

Remus blinked his eyes several times. A huge smile formed as he realized it hadn't been a dream. "Of course I did, with you be my side, I sleep like a bear." He leaned forward to kiss his mate.

"Good morning, I am glad you slept well, and what a pleasant surprise to see you again Sirius."

Both men turned to face McGonagall. Remus turned a lovely shade of red, and tried to get out of the bed. Sirius tightened his hold on his lover. People had to find out sooner or later.

"Good morning Minerva, you didn't really think a ratty piece of drapery would keep me away." His eyes sparkled with amusement, "Poppy will have me fixed and good as new in no time." Remus averted his eyes, he couldn't destroy Sirius' hope.

Minerva noticed.

Sirius told McGonagall the story of his return and how he ended up in the hospital wing. Madam Pomfrey had come out of her office and listened, she wished she had better news for him. She had been up most of the night doing research.

"Minerva, could you leave for a moment, I want to talk to Remus and Sirius in private."

"Of course, I will be in my office if you need anything." Minerva got up and left the hospital wing.

Pomfrey turned to face Sirius. "I am sorry Sirius I can not fix this…yet. I have not given up."

"What are you saying? I am going to be stuck like this." Sirius' forehead was tense and his voice was strained.

"For now yes, but I will not give up. I will do everything I can."

Sirius was silent.

"Is there anything special we need to do?" Remus switched to auto drive. Someone had to get the facts and remain level headed.

"Well, there will be certain equipment he will need, and procedures he will need to follow. It will take sometime to learn how to get around and perform everyday activities." She tried to sound as pleasant as possible, no need having him think the worst.

Madam Pomfrey conjured a wheelchair and demonstrated how to use it. A shower chair was also produced. She went into great detail about how Sirius would have to handle his bladder and bowels.

Sirius stared off into the distance.

Remus was soaking up all the new information, asking several questions on the various procedures.

"What about sex?" Sirius' eyes grew troubled. He knew that this wasn't permanent, but he wasn't going to go without while he waited for a cure.

"You can have a healthy sex life, but with this catheter you will lose the use of your penis." She was taken aback by the incredulous look Sirius was giving her.

"Well, give me a different one then. I am not giving up that function." Sirius scowled.

"I can give you an intermittent catheter instead. You will have more freedom during sex, but, you will have to monitor your bladder, and catheterize yourself several times a day. There is a greater risk of infection with this."

"Do it," Sirius did not hesitate to answer. "It won't be long term anyway."

Madam Pomfrey switched catheters and gave them a detailed set of instructions on the proper method of catheterization. She was worried about Sirius' attitude, he was certain she would cure him. What would happen if she couldn't?

When she was certain both Sirius and Remus understood the procedures she allowed them to leave. She would be checking up on Sirius frequently.

Remus helped Sirius into the wheelchair, and wheeled him to the front gate where a carriage was waiting for them. Madam Pomfrey would not allow them to apparate, floo, or use a portkey. She deemed it too dangerous for now.

Remus helped Sirius into the carriage and they made there way home.


	3. Chapter 3

**Title:** Precious & Fragile Things - Chapter Three (3/6) WooHoo half way there!  
**Author:** Andrea88  
**Rating:** R for the general theme and perhaps for sex as well  
**Pairing:** Sirius & Remus  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, JKR's  
**Summery:** Sirius returns from the beyond the veil, but paid a price.  
**Warnings:** It maybe angsty, It maybe icky. Some won't be pretty. **Spoilers for Half Blood Price **

**Precious & Fragile Things **

**Chapter Three  
**

_**Anger is short-lived madness. Horace**_

The ride was filled with silence. Sirius hated having to be lifted into the carriage by Remus. He felt so useless. What else wouldn't he be able to do? How much of his independence would he lose?

As the carriage made its way through the woods, Sirius remembered the last time he had been there. It was after the Triwizard Cup. The reason for that visit was a somber one, but the time had been magnificent. He and Remus had some quality time together, something they both desperately needed. Moony and Padfoot had romped in these same woods.

The cottage was just as Sirius remembered it. It was small and simple, surrounded by colorful flowerbeds. Privacy was plentiful; the nearest neighbor was kilometers away. Under any other circumstances he would be happy to be here.

He could hear Remus putting that infernal chair together. Enduring another demeaning act of being picked up and placed in the wheelchair, Sirius cursed Poppy for not working faster. The cursing became more severe as Sirius realized the path was covered in loose stone. Sure it looked pretty but was impossible for him to wheel himself through. He seethed as Remus calmly pushed him to the front door.

"Are you hungry?" Remus asked as he took off his cloak and headed for the kitchen.

"That's a silly question, I'm always hungry." He began to wheel himself towards the kitchen when he suddenly stopped. The hallway was too narrow. Frustrated he called out to Remus, as he did not have a wand yet.

Remus recognized the problem and with a flick of his wand the hallways expanded. Following behind Sirius, he tried to catalogue any other potential problems. A loud grumble emanating from his stomach indicated the need for dinner.

Normally the sight of Remus preparing food would make Sirius run for his life. Unfortunately, the years alone had turned Remus into a semi decent cook.

"What do you want me to do?"

"If you could make the salad that would be great," Remus was busy collecting the pots and pans he would need.

Sirius wheeled himself to the icebox, and after a few awkward moments, opened it. He filled his lap with everything he needed. This was a plus he thought, he only had to make one trip. Instinctively, he went to the counter to prepare the salad.

"The counters are too damn high," huffed Sirius.

"Use the kitchen table." Remus said and placed a cutting board and knife on the table.

"Fine," Sirius mumbled as he moved a chair out of the way to make room for his.

Dinner was eagerly consumed. Afterwards, Remus cleared the table and did the dishes. Sirius, on the other hand, grabbed a bottle of fire whiskey and headed for the living room.  
The transfer to the couch went well. It took a bit of time to rearrange his legs into a 'comfortable' position. It looked so unnatural to him. Tilting his head back, he took a much needed drink of fire whiskey. Straight from the bottle would have to do, as he couldn't reach the glasses.

Remus walked into the room carrying two glasses and sat down next to Sirius. He pried the bottle from Sirius' hands and filled the glasses liberally. Sirius put his arm around Remus drawing him closer, eliciting a pleasant sigh from both parties.

"We need to tell Harry," Sirius said as he ran his fingers through Remus' hair. He was amazed at how easy it was to fall back into their familiar patterns.

"Yes, a letter maybe the best way. Wouldn't want Harry fainting at the sight of you, best to prepare him," Remus absently traced circles on Sirius' thigh.

"You're probably right, don't fancy giving my Godson a heart attack."

"We can write the letter first thing tomorrow," Remus paused. Harry was staying at the Weasley's. If Molly were to find out then it was a given that everyone else would too. Tonks was sure to find out. He had told Sirius the basic things that happened while he was away, but he had left out that bit of information. Now was as good a time as any he reckoned.

"Sirius, I need to tell you something that happened while you were gone." Remus refilled his glass and drained it in one go.

"What," Sirius tried to hide the worry in his voice. He prayed that Remus hadn't met someone else –that would be awkward.

"Well…it seems Nymphadora," he paused not wanting to say it out loud, "has fallen in love with me." Remus braced himself for an angry Sirius. He did not expect Sirius to be bellowing with laughter.

The love of his life was laughing at him. Tears were welling in Sirius' eyes. As much as Remus reveled in the sound of Sirius laughter, he thought it deserved a scowl. Sirius had no idea how awful it was to have Tonks following him around like a little lost puppy – well maybe he did. Remus told him of the whole Tonks 'affair'.

"Didn't you tell her about us Remus?" He said incredulously.

"I thought I had explained it, but obviously I was wrong."

"Well its time people knew about us." Empting his glass Sirius noticed the hand on his thigh. How he longed to feel this simple touch. "Stop it," he glowered as he brushed the offending hand away.

"Maybe we should get some sleep, long day ahead of us tomorrow." Remus got up and stood behind the wheelchair, holding it in place.

Sirius could feel his blood pressure rising as he transferred from the couch to the chair.

Transferring into the bed was surprisingly easy. Sirius managed to get himself in a comfortable position without much hassle. Remus had laid out a pair of pajamas for him. The nights could still be a bit brisk.

Finally managing to remove his trousers, Sirius thought sleeping in the nude may be in order. Cold air be damned! But it was chilly and the blankets were rather thread bare. With a heavy sigh he proceeded to fumble with the pajama bottoms.

"Let me help you," Remus said as slipped the pajamas on Sirius' legs.

"Thanks," the reply came through gritted teeth. "But you are only supposed to undress me."

"I don't mind, either way I get to touch you." Remus said with a mischievous tilt in his smile. He leaned in and kissed him.

He loved kissing Remus he could spend hours doing nothing else. Thinking back on all the times he became hard just from this, he pulled Remus closer to deepen the kiss. He felt Remus' hand trail along his neck, shoulder, chest, navel, and then nothing. He knew the hand was resting on his hip. Remus always did that. But he could feel nothing.

Maybe he just needed more time to react.

Running his fingers down Remus' spine he could feel the quivering response. Resting his hands on the small of Remus' back, he could feel the rolling of hips. Sirius turned his attention to Remus' arousal. Stroking rhythmically, relishing the feel of the thrusts against his hand. He still knew how to reduce his lover to nothing but guttural noises.

While Remus was riding out his release, he steered the same attention to Sirius.

"Stop," Sirius snapped and pushed Remus away.

He nuzzled closer, placing kisses along Sirius' neck.

"Dammit Remus stop it!" He positioned himself on his side, and pulled the blanket close. "I can't feel anything."

"I'm sorry," was the only response Remus had.

This was all new to Remus. He was certain that there was a way around this, a way for Sirius to enjoy this as much as he did. They both needed to adjust to this new situation. Placing a soft kiss on Sirius' head and whispering another apology, Remus rolled on his side and tried to sleep.

Remus woke early, he hadn't slept much at all. As much as he wanted to resolve this issue, there were more important things to attend to. Pulling on his robe he headed to the kitchen to make a much needed breakfast.

Sirius lay in bed and fumed. Why was this happening to him? He wasn't going to take the loss of his favorite pastime lying down –so to speak. Hopefully, Remus would not want to talk about it.

Transferring into his wheelchair he headed for the loo. The bathroom seemed larger. Looking around he noticed that the counter top had been lowered. A full length mirror was on the wall opposite the shower. The toilet had been raised to be more level with his wheelchair and safety bars installed. A glance at the shower revealed that it too had bars. A small chair stood in the far end of the shower. It was made of plastic, was backless and had support handles on the sides.

He reeled at everything Remus had done. To him it reinforced his inabilities. Moving over to the toilet, he scowled, the bars did make things easier. Not that he would ever admit to that. Opening the cabinet closest to him, he found, catheters, rubber gloves and lubricant. Sighing, he though about which of the evils to tackle first.

Putting a rubber glove on one hand, he carefully lubricated his index finger. At least this was something he had some experience with. He still felt mortified.

When he was finished he removed the glove and tossed it in the rubbish bin. Putting on fresh gloves he reached for a catheter. Poppy had shown him how to do this, he was horrified then and he was horrified now. Maybe if he didn't think about what he was doing it would be easier. Thank Merlin he wouldn't be able to feel this. Taking several deep breaths he inserted the catheter and watched the fluid drain out.

Sirius caught his image in the mirror. The great Sirius Black reduced to this. He threw the box of rubber gloves at his reflection. It wouldn't break. Everything within reach assaulted the offending mirror. Frustrated, Sirius made to sit in his chair. He had forgotten to put on the brakes. Struggling to get in the chair, it slipped away and he hit the floor.

"Bloody fucking hell," Sirius shouted as he stared at the ceiling.

Remus having heard the steady stream of obscenities ran into the bathroom. Seeing Sirius prone on the floor he rushed to help him up.

"Don't fucking touch me." Shrugging off Remus hand, he rolled onto his stomach. Making sure the brakes were locked, he pulled himself up. Adjusting his legs he unlocked the brakes, turned the chair around and glared at Remus.

"Get out."

Remus couldn't remember the last time he has seen Sirius this angry. It broke his heart to see him this way, but he knew Sirius had to work this out himself. Closing the door Remus headed to the kitchen for a strong cup of tea.

Sirius turned on the taps and let the hot water wash over him. He couldn't even do what he normally would, bloody useless equipment. If this is what it was going to be like…he would end it.

Some time later, Sirius wheeled into the kitchen. Remus had placed his breakfast under a warming charm. Remus himself was on his fifth cup of tea.

"I wrote and sent the letter to Harry." Remus paused waiting for Sirius' reaction.

"Good hopefully he can get here soon. I'm not really sure how he will take seeing me like this." He glared at his eggs.

"Sirius, he won't care. He will just be happy to have you back, as I am." Remus reached out and covered Sirius' hand with his own.

"You still have that muggle TV here?" He asked wheeling into the living room.

"Yes, I do. I even managed to charm it to receive stations from all over the world." Remus watched as Sirius settled on the couch and turned on the TV. "The black contraption on the table is the remote control, you'll be able to switch the stations with it."

"Brilliant," And he proceeded to flip through all the hundreds of stations.

Remus deciding that the clicking of stations was not music to his ears, spent the rest of the day in the gardens. This type of work always relaxed him. Getting dirt under his nails and seeing the fruits of his labor, gave him a feeling of accomplishment. Madam Pomfrey was due to stop by, he needed to wash up.

Walking into the living room he noticed that Sirius had fallen asleep. Watching Sirius sleep had always been one of his favorite pastimes. Times like this he would lie next to Sirius and gently wake him with kisses. Feeling his face fluster, he headed for the bathroom. Somehow he knew if he woke Sirius he wouldn't get the usual response. A long, hot shower is what he needed.

The wards he had set alerted him to an intruder. Guessing that it was Madam Pomfrey, he put on a robe and headed to the door. Opening the door he saw not only Poppy , but Harry as well. Oh dear.

"Hello Remus, Harry met me on the way here. I didn't say anything."

"Remus what's wrong, why is Madam Pomfrey here? Are you alright, your letter was so cryptic." Harry tried to walk past Remus but was stopped.

"Harry, I need you to remain silent. What you are going to see will shock you, but it can all be explained."

Remus led the way into the living room. At the sight of his 'dead' Godfather Harry's jaw dropped. He held his mouth shut so he wouldn't make a sound. There had to be a reason for this.

Poppy stood near Harry as Remus gently sat next to Sirius.

"Sirius, you need to wake up." Remus prayed there wouldn't be a scene in front of Harry and Poppy.

"Mmm Remus, I had the strangest dream." Still clouded by sleep he pulled Remus towards him and kissed him.

Remus struggled to pull away and to prevent Sirius' hands from roaming under his robe.

"Sirius we have company." Managing to move out of reach, he motioned to Harry and Poppy.

Turning his head towards Harry and Poppy, Sirius realized it wasn't a dream. And he had just inadvertently informed Harry of his relationship with Remus. Bloody Hell.

"Sirius, is it really you?" Harry ran towards his Godfather and embraced him a big bear hug. "How did this happen? When did this happen?" He spotted the wheelchair, " What's wrong, are you hurt?"

"Harry why don't you help Remus start dinner, I'm famished. Poppy needs to see me alone for a bit. I promise to talk to you alone right after." This was not how he had planned this reunion.

"Ok," Harry said as he followed Remus into the kitchen. He was going to hold Sirius to his word.

Poppy examined Sirius and found that the condition had not changed. She explained to Sirius how she was still doing everything she could to find a cure. Having finished being poked and prodded, he transferred into the blasted chair and headed for the loo.

"Harry, Sirius wants you to wait for him in the living room. He'll be out shortly." She smiled as Harry bounded off to the couch. "Remus may I speak with you."

"Yes, of course," Remus set the carrots aside and motioned for Poppy to follow. "I think we will have more privacy outside."

Harry sat on the couch, absently playing with a loose thread. He watched as Sirius wheeled into the room and transferred to the couch. Harry wrapped his arms around him and sobbed on his shoulder.

"I am so sorry, I should have known it was a trap." Tears were streaming down his face. "It's all my fault, I am so glad you are back."

"Harry, it wasn't your fault." He held the boy close. "It was brave of you to try and rescue me. I am honored that you care so much about me."

Sirius told him about the events of the past few days. How he had returned, and how he couldn't move or feel his legs.

"You are a paraplegic," Harry said nonplussed. "That's what muggles call it. It is common and they lead happy full lives. So I am sure you will to."

"Well, Poppy is still working on this and she will fix it."

"So…you and Remus," A bemused expression taking over, "why didn't you ever tell me?"

"Things were always so hectic, we never got around to it." Looking Harry squarely in the eye he asked, "You alright with this?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" The corners of his mouth quirked up, "Poor Tonks, she's gonna go all mousey again."

Sirius stared at his Godson and broke into a barking laugh. "If you want to see Remus turn about ten different shades of red, mention that during dinner."

Poppy and Remus returned from their walk. She made one final check of Sirius, said good-bye and left. Remus told the two to stay put, they had a lot of catching up to do. He would fix dinner.

The wards went off.

"I'll get that. Poppy probably forgot something." Remus walked to the front door. He was still holding a bottle of wine that he was about to open.

"Does Remus always spend his day in his bathrobe?" Harry asked.

"No, he'll be utterly mortified when he realizes it. He's had a rough day." He felt a slight pang of guilt for not mentioning it to Remus, but it passed.

Sirius was telling Harry of the many ways to embarrass Remus, when they heard a crash. More precisely they heard the wine bottle shattering. Harry leapt from the couch, wand at the ready. Sirius made to jump off the couch when he remembered he couldn't. He muttered several curses under his breath. Harry rounded the corner, his wand held out and broke into a fit of laughter.

Remus was frantically trying to pry Tonks off of him. Apparently, seeing Remus answer the door in his bathrobe, holding a bottle of wine, was invitation to pounce.

"Bloody hell," was all he said when he finally broke from her grip. He rushed to his bedroom to change, making sure to lock the door behind him.

"Wotcher Harry, what are you doing here?" Tonks' cheeks were flushed, it matched her hair.

"Dory is that you?" Sirius shouted out. He burst into laughter as he heard the umbrella stand crash to the floor.

"Sirius," was all Tonks could manage in her frazzled state.

"In the flesh," he transferred into his chair and made for the kitchen. "Who else needs a drink?" He was going to need several he reckoned.

Remus returned, fully dressed, and started preparing dinner. Grabbing the fire whiskey, he poured a good four fingers worth. He was going to need it. He had hoped that he wouldn't have to deal with Tonks until much later.

"Remus, this is so wonderful." She snaked her arms around Remus' waist. "I am sure he will be happy for us."

Roughly pushing her arms away, Remus turned to face the living room. The smirks on Harry and Sirius' faces did not please him.

"I took the liberty to add a room for Harry. You three should go see it and make sure it will suffice." He tried to sound as polite as possible, but that was hard with a clenched jaw.

Sirius led Harry and Tonks down the hallway, giving an impromptu tour.

"This is the loo," He pushed open the door to show that it was indeed a bathroom.

"I see Remus made it accessible." Harry said nodding in approval.

"Yes he did," was the tart reply. "Over here is your bedroom Harry." He entered the room to inspect Remus' work.

"Remus did a great job, but where are you staying Sirius?" Tonks asked.

"Oh I'm sleeping," he wheeled across the hall and opened the door, "in here with Remus." A devilish wink emphasized his statement.

Harry turned to face the wall so he could hide his need to laugh. Sirius was basking in the way Tonks' jaw dropped. The color left her face and he noticed that her hair was becoming less pink. Good at least that was settled once and for all. Remus was his and she needed to keep her mitts off of him.

Tonks stared at Sirius and Harry. It couldn't be true. She never noticed any of the signs, and she was so good at spotting them.

"Aww Sirius that's a good one, trying to pull the wool over little Dory's eyes," she laughed as she headed back to the kitchen. Remus probably slept on the couch and let Sirius have the bed.

"She really is dense," Sirius stated as he watched her retreat to the kitchen.

"Seems so, maybe she has had one too many concussions."

"Well I may have to settle this, even if it causes Remus a great deal of embarrassment."

Following behind Sirius, Harry noticed how he was wheeling himself. If he had the chance he was going to get Sirius a pair of gloves. He always saw those in wheelchairs wearing gloves, so it had to help protect the hands. Yes, he would get a nice pair of black leather gloves, with the finger tips cut off. He reckoned that muggle London would be the best place to go. Perhaps, Remus would go with him. He wanted to spend some time alone with Remus, get his side of the story.

Upon entering the kitchen, they saw the table set and Remus in the process of opening a bottle of wine.

"Remus," Sirius said as he eyed Tonks, who was sitting at the table ogling his Remus.

"What is it Sirius?" Remus walked over, wine bottle still in his hands.

"Nothing, just this," he pulled Remus into his lap and kissed him.

Harry snickered. Tonks harrumphed in dissent. And Remus let the wine bottle slip through his fingers and shatter.

Dinner was interesting to say the least. Harry talked about his quest of the horcruxes. He insisted that Sirius help him in this venture. Sirius snarled, what was he able to do? Harry suggested research. The accompanying tirade as to how research was a waste of time, garnered him growl from Remus. Tonks just jabbed at her roast chicken and vegetables and let her hair turn a God awful mud color.

Time unfortunately does not heal all wounds. Sirius was finding this difficult to live with. Months had gone by and there wasn't any improvement in his condition, other than he could pop an impressive wheelie. His godson was still staying with them. Remus and Harry were still trying to convince him that research was a valuable contribution to the cause. Hogwash, it was just something to make him feel useful. Pity, that's all it was.

The full moon had come and gone. It was another reminder of his condition. He had wanted to be there for Remus. Changing into Padfoot was still as natural as breathing, but his ailment didn't change. Any muggle seeing Padfoot drag his hid legs would have put him down. It was decided that even with the Wolfsbane potion, it wouldn't be safe. Moony may not take kindly to a lame Padfoot. So, on the night of the full moon, Remus transformed in the basement alone. Sirius on the other hand, found Mundungus' stash of Wild Irish Rose. He had hidden it in Remus' pantry. Sure it tasted like kerosene, but it got the job done.

Sirius had become irritable. The slightest things set him off in a rage. Mundungus' stash was getting smaller and smaller.

Opening his eyes, Sirius realized two things. One, it was late morning, and two the sun was way too bright. Upon entering the kitchen he spotted a note from Remus on the table. A glass of hangover potion and a plate of scones resided next to the note. Sirius read the note as he drank the potion. Remus was out running some errands –again. He had been spending a lot of time away, and it made Sirius edgy. Grabbing a scone and a bottle of Mundungus' finest, he headed for the couch.

Remus returned late in the afternoon. Sirius was asleep on the couch, and a half drunk bottle on the floor. Left overs would have to do for dinner; it had been a long day. Cup of tea in hand he stepped outside. Sitting in a chair, he closed his eyes and breathed in the scents of summer. He picked up a familiar scent in the air and smiled.

"Hello Kingsley."

"Hi Remus," he pulled a chair closer and sat down. "You really need to set up some wards I can't get past." He smirked and placed a bottle of red currant rum on the nearby table.

"I would never keep you out Kingsley, you know that." He pulled out his wand and conjured some glasses.

"How are you holding up?" Concern was etched in his eyes. "Your wish came true." Kingsley looked off in to the distance.

"I am thrilled to have him back, but it's not easy. I wish I could make things easier for him. Help him understand that this isn't the end of the world."

"That won't be easy, but I am sure you can do it. It'll take time." He filled the glasses and raised his for a toast. "To dreams come true."

"I wish yours had come true Kingsley. I know you'd give anything to be called an imp again."

"Very true, you know you're the only one that knows that was my pet name. Tell that mutt of yours and I'll hex you." Grinning he refilled their glasses.

Several drinks later Remus was feeling much better. Talking with Kingsley had really helped him forget the present problems. The friendship with Kingsley was relatively new. It had been forged in the common bond of grief. It had been a godsend to be able to discuss his loss with someone who knew what it felt like.

"Thank you Kingsley, your friendship has meant the world to me. I hope you will come around often." He placed his hand over Kingsley's.

"What the bloody hell is going on out here?" Sirius was irate as his gazed locked on their hands.

"Sirius," Remus pulled his hand away. "You remember Kingsley."

"Yeah I do, get your mitts off Remus. Just what the hell is going on out here?" His glare and venom was directed at the unwelcome guest.

"I better go, good seeing you again Remus, Sirius." Kingsley took his leave quickly.

"Sirius there was no call for that."

"Were you with Kingsley? I bet you were, didn't mourn me long did you. Or are you shagging him now because I can't?" He replied through gritted teeth.

Remus stormed up to Sirius, looking him squarely in the eye. His eyes were smoldering, his nostrils flared and hands gripped Sirius' wheelchair.

"How dare you even suggest that." Remus turned, grabbed the bottle of red currant rum and stormed off into the woods.

Sirius watched as Remus disappeared into the forest.

"I can't believe you said that." Harry stood in the doorway looking at Sirius.

"It doesn't concern you."

Harry shook his head in disbelief and went after Remus.

Sirius knocked over the chair Kingsley had been sitting in. Wheeling into the kitchen he bumped into the table. Frustrated, he punched the wall, leaving a hole. His knuckles were bloody and he didn't care. He retreated to his haven. The couch and Wild Irish Rose were waiting for him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Title:** Precious & Fragile Things - Chapter Four (4/6)  
**Author:** Andrea88  
**Rating:** R for the general theme and perhaps for sex as well  
**Pairing:** Sirius & Remus  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, JKR's  
**Summery:** Sirius returns from the beyond the veil, but paid a price.  
**Warnings:** It maybe angsty, It maybe icky. Some won't be pretty. **Spoilers for Half Blood Price **

**Precious & Fragile Things **

**Chapter Four  
**

_**Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. M. Kathleen Casey**_

Opening his eyes to the invading sunlight, Sirius realized that he had fallen asleep on the couch. This was troublesome, as Remus never let him sleep on the couch. Sirius also noted that Harry was staring at him, a scowl fixed on his face.

"Good morning Harry."

"What you did was cruel."

"But…" Sirius was cut off.

"You have no idea how hard it was for him when you fell. Everything he is going through now." Harry looked at his Godfather and shook his head in disgust. "I thought you loved him." Not waiting for a reply Harry stood up and left the room.

Sirius made his way to the bathroom. He was shocked at Harry's accusation. Sirius loved Remus with all his heart. There wasn't anything Sirius wouldn't do for him. But, it had been a long time since he had seen Remus smile. Oh Merlin, had he alienated the most important person in his life?

If only he could walk again. He prayed to a higher power, promising to be a better person, if only he could walk again. He would change his ways and make amends for his lousy behaviour.

After showering, Sirius headed for the bedroom; he needed some clean clothes. Rifling through various drawers, he found a nice pair of jeans and a black tee shirt. He transferred to the bed to change. His lover's scent filled him, if only he could touch Remus again. The fun they had had in this bed, he would give anything to have it back.

"Harry can you come here," Sirius called out as he saw Harry walk past.

"What do you need?" His tone made it apparent that he was still mad.

"I am sorry and I promise to set things right." Sirius smiled, as he knew if he turned over a new leaf he would be cured.

"I'm not the one that needs to hear it."

"I know and I will make it up to Remus, I promise. But I wanted to know if you could help me with my exercises."

"Sure," Harry entered the room.

"Thanks, for being here and putting up with me."

Sirius hated doing the exercises. He thought they were a waste of time. But this was a 'new' Sirius and he did them with an almost smile on his face. Harry talked about his concerns with the horcruxes, and how he wished Sirius would reconsider and help. Through gritted teeth Sirius agreed. It went with his promise. They discussed Remus, Sirius had a plan and needed some help.

Remus took a deep breath before entering his home. He was shocked to see the house clean – and the couch empty. A pleasant aroma filled the air. His nose led him to the kitchen.

"Hi Remus," Harry said as he stirred a pot.

"Remus," Sirius said as he wheeled towards him. Pulling him down and planting a kiss on his cheek. "Sit, have a glass of wine, dinner's almost done."

Flabbergasted he sat and sipped his wine. He was speechless.

"Harry and I made dinner." Sirius beamed, he knew the way to Remus' heart was through his stomach. "We made roast beef, mashed potatoes, and carrots. For dessert we have chocolate mousse –your favorite." Sirius tried not to think of why it was his favorite.

Remus smiled all through dinner. He couldn't remember the last time he had such a great meal. Sirius seemed to be in better spirits, he didn't know why. He didn't care; Sirius was smiling, laughing and not knee deep in cheap booze. Remus choked on his wine when he heard that Sirius would help with research. He never thought he'd see the day where Sirius would do desk work.

Lying in bed, huddled close to Sirius, Remus dreamed of a brighter future. Things would be alright.

Sirius just repeated his mantra, 'if I am a better person I will walk again'.  



	5. Chapter 5

**Title:** Precious & Fragile Things - Chapter Five (5/6)  
**Author:** Andrea88  
**Rating:** R for the general theme and perhaps for sex as well  
**Pairing:** Sirius & Remus  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, JKR's  
**Summery:** Sirius returns from the beyond the veil, but paid a price.  
**Warnings:** It maybe angsty, It maybe icky. Some won't be pretty. **Spoilers for Half Blood Price **

**Precious & Fragile Things **

**Chapter Five  
**

_**The only disability in life is a bad attitude. - Scott Hamilton**_

_**Every thought is a seed. If you plant crab apples, don't count on harvesting Golden Delicious. - Bill Meyer**_

_**  
**_

_**  
**_Sirius rolled over and felt the empty space next to him. It was cold, Remus had left the bed sometime ago. He was always gone when Sirius woke. He had no idea how Remus spent his days, but he had theories. None of the theories pleased Sirius.

"Accio catheter," at least Sirius could still do magic. 

The catheter whizzed into his hand. He emptied his bladder into a container he kept by the bed. Waving his wand the container cleaned itself. Closing his eyes and pulling the covers over his head, he went back to sleep. In his dreams everything was the way it should be.

He had tried doing the right thing. Exercises, cleaning, cooking, desk work, and overall niceness had all been done for naught. He had kept his promise and was still useless. His legs would never work again and he wasn't ready to accept that.

Keeping himself holed up in his room was all he felt like doing. How long had he been in bed, days, weeks, months, he didn't know, and it really didn't matter anyway. Harry brought his meals, but he didn't eat much if anything. A stash of fire whiskey was hidden under the bed. He was set, showering was over rated anyway.

"Sirius," Harry called out.

"Go away."

Harry hesitated a moment before entering the room carrying a tray of food.

"I brought you some food." Harry walked over to the bed and tried to hide his concern. Sirius looked awful. Harry hated seeing his Godfather like this. For a time he thought Sirius had learned to manage this. He was close to his normal self and then something happened and he was lost again.

"I'm not hungry." Sirius mumbled from under the covers.

"You have to eat something. I'm not leaving until you do." Settling himself on Remus' side of the bed he waited for Sirius to emerge.

"Shall I sing?  
Weasley is our King,  
Weasley is our King,  
He didn't let the Quaffle in  
Weasley is our King."

"Alright, you win." Sirius sat up and looked at Harry. "You truly are your father's son." At Harry's puzzled look he continued, "he would sing the Hogwarts school song or I'm Henry the 8th non-stop until I gave in."

"Really," Harry smiled, he loved hearing stories about his father.

"Yes, but he would also sit on me while singing off key. Remus would watch us and just shake his head."

"Remus didn't help you?"

"Nah, unless it was near the full moon. Moony was overly protective of his ma- of me." Sirius nibbled on a piece of toast.

Harry tried to stifle a laugh. "I am just trying to picture Remus coming to your rescue."

"Remus was always there for me. He always managed to keep me in line. As long as Remus was by my side everything was fine." Sirius tossed his half eaten toast onto the tray. "I'm tired." And with that he lay back down and pulled the covers over his head. Memories of his youth and Remus were too much to bear.

"Ok, sleep well Sirius." Harry left the room. At least Sirius had been somewhat social, that was a start.

Sirius heard Harry get up and leave, finally he was alone. Reaching under the bed, he grabbed a bottle of fire whiskey. Harry reminded him so much of James, and how he had failed him.

It was a nice day so Harry decided to make the most of it. He stepped outside and mounted his Firebolt. Flying freed him, he didn't have to think about anything. The rush of air against his face as he soared and dived purged him of worries. He was just a kid, and should do fun things. Voldemort, horcruxes, and out of sorts Godfathers were to be dealt with when he touched down again. But for this moment he was free.

Sirius watched Harry fly through the bedroom window. How he missed flying. Taking a long swig of whiskey he realized he'd never be able to do that again either.

Harry landed when he saw Remus arrive with Madam Pomfrey.

"Hi Remus, Madam Pomfrey."

"Hello Harry, any changes with Sirius?"

"No, he ate half a piece of toast. We talked a bit about my father and then he went back to sleep." Harry wished he had better news for Remus.

"Poppy, maybe you can do something for him."

"I will try Remus, but he refuses to listen to reason." Poppy shook her head and went to check on her patient.

"Harry, care to help me with dinner?"

"Sure, just let me wash up and change." Harry bolted to his room.

Remus set about preparing dinner. He had been gone all day and was too tired to make anything fancy. Roast chicken, chips, peas and a treacle tart for dessert. Oddly, it was Sirius' favorite meal. Hopefully, he would eat it.

Poppy returned, her report as grim as ever. She was at her wits end. Sirius was convinced his life was over. After briefing Remus she left.

"Wotcher Remus," Tonks said as she entered the kitchen.

Remus rolled his eyes, he really needed to set up new wards.

"Hello Tonks, what brings you here? I am afraid Sirius isn't up for company at the moment."

"I didn't come to see Sirius, I came to see you." She stepped closer to him.

"Does The Order need me to do something?"

"No, I need you to do something." And with that she pushed Remus against the wall and kissed him.

"What the bloody hell do you think you are doing?" Remus shoved Tonks off.

"Get off it Remus, how long have you been without? Sirius can't perform his duties. Why deny yourself physical pleasure? I can be anyone you want." She screwed up her eyes and changed.

Remus watched as Tonks changed into Sirius. It was the spitting image of Sirius, except for the eyes. Suddenly, she was on him again, shoving her tongue down his throat and putting her hands on his backside.

"Get out of my house." He voice was dangerously low.

"You know you want it." Her hands slipped under his shirt.

"Get the bloody hell out of my house." It came out with a growl. It was taking all he had not to lash out at her.

Tonks was at least smart enough to know when to fold 'em. She changed back to her normal self and headed out the door.

"You know where to find me when you change your mind."

Shaking from his anger, Remus kicked a chair across the room.

Sirius heard the whole conversation and felt a tear run down his cheek.

"Are you alright Remus?" Harry asked, having witnessed the incident.

"Yes, I'm fine thank you." Taking a deep breath he resumed his task.

"Actually, can you keep an eye on this for a moment? I need to change the wards." He left not waiting to hear Harry's answer.

Dinner was a somber affair. Sirius stayed in bed and barely picked at his food. He didn't even touch the tart. Harry went to The Burrow after dinner, he wanted to spend sometime with Ron. Leaving Remus and Sirius alone might just be what the healer ordered. Remus sat at the kitchen table and did some research. His ink stained fingers thumbing through various texts and papers.

Sirius stared at the ceiling. He thought about what Tonks had said, she was right. Remus deserved someone whole, someone who could attend to all his needs, even if it was his prat of a cousin. Remus would never leave him voluntarily. It would much easier on everyone if he were dead.

He wasn't sure if one could Avada Kedavra one's self. But bodies did tend to bleed out if cut too deeply. One flick of his wand and it would all be over. Suicide is painless, so they say. Feeling around for his wand he wondered if he should leave a note.

Hastily he scribbled a letter to Remus, and placed it on his nightstand. Raising his wand, he braced himself for the spell. But the spell never crossed his lips. He was flooded with images, images of Remus. The grief and pain Sirius would cause him would be unforgivable. Lowering his wand he cried, there was no way out of this nightmare.

The clanking of a spoon against a teacup woke Sirius. Glancing over his shoulder he saw Remus sitting with his back against the headboard, glowering at him.

"Good Morning Remus," he said trying to sound as pleasant as possible.

"Explain," he said holding Sirius' letter.

Oh shit, he was in for it now. Damn fire whiskey, he thought he had destroyed that last night.

"It's…"

Remus cut him off. "Do you really think this little of me?"

"Of course not, I just thought it would be better for everyone if I was out of the picture."

"Oh how silly of me, naturally losing you again would make everything better. I am sure Harry and I would jump for joy. Hell I might even run out and shag the first person I see." The bitter words stung Sirius.

"I heard Tonks, and she's right. You deserve someone who can perform." Sirius stared at the blanket, it was easier than seeing the anger and hurt in Remus' eyes.

"I will say this only once. I love you. I do not want anyone else. I do not want to shag anyone else. I just want you. Sex isn't everything you prat." His tone was growing more venomous with each word.

"You don't understand. This is just another prison. I am useless."

"It's only a prison if you allow it to be." Remus rose from the bed flinging the letter to Sirius, and left.

Sirius felt the tears well up and decided that he needed his friend Ogden.

Remus fled the house in search of the one person he could turn to. The Sirius situation was getting out of hand. He had turned to books to help him find the answers he sought. Seeing Sirius like this tore him apart and he had done everything he could. The ball was in Sirius' court now. Right now he needed to find Kingsley, he was the one person he could talk to.

"Hello Remus," Molly's deceptively sweet voice filled the kitchen. "I decided to escort Harry here. I brought something to eat." She placed several dishes on the table. "Harry needed some good home cooking."

"Thank you Molly," He tried to hide his contempt. "Sirius is asleep and I'm not sure he'd want company."

"I wanted to talk to you about that Remus dear."

"He's doing fine, I appreciate your concern."

"I think it would be better for everyone if Harry stayed at The Burrow."

"What," Harry and Remus said in unison.

"Really now, he's not fit to be Harry's Godfather." She was appalled that they were questioning her judgement.

"That's not your decision to make." Remus couldn't believe the audacity.

"I think I'd rather stay here Mrs. Weasley. Sirius is my Godfather and I wouldn't want it any other way." Harry stood next to Remus.

"I really think I would now what's better for Harry. I'm sorry Remus but neither you nor Sirius is fit to handle it."

"What do you mean Remus isn't fit," Harry was shocked to hear this from Mrs. Weasley. She had always been like a second mother to him. Now he was appalled.

"Well his monthly problem does hinder him my dear." She was still sounding sickly sweet.

"I assure you I handle my problem quite well."

Sirius heard the conversation in the kitchen. Molly was right Harry should go with her. He wasn't fit to be a Godfather.

_"But I chose you to be Harry's Godfather."_ The voice in his head that sounded very much like James said.

"You chose wrong."

_"Lily and I did no such thing. We knew you and Remus would make the perfect Godparents."_

"I'm useless to him, to Harry, to Remus, to everybody."

_"Pathetic yes, useless no, you can still be there for him. Give him advice, help through tough times and give him the love he deserves." _

"But I'm stuck in this bloody chair."

_"So? Ok you won't be running any marathons with him. So what, there is so much more to life than walking. Stop being a pathetic wanker and do what you do best. It's only a prison if you make it." _

Great now he was going mad to boot.

"What is Sirius doing now Remus? Is he still holed up in bed, drinking himself blind?" Molly was actually raising her voice, much to her dismay.

"That's not fair he's been through a lot. He needs time to adjust." Harry blurted out.

"You don't need to stick up for him dear. It's ok to want to get away from him."

That did it.

"Molly I will kindly ask you to leave," Remus' eyes were filled with rage.

"Do I need to come back with a Ministry official?"

"That won't be necessary Molly." Everyone turned to see Sirius in the doorway. "James and Lily named me Godfather, not you."

Sirius wheeled towards the door and picked up Harry's broom. "Come on Harry show me what you've got." He tossed the broom to Harry and watched as a smile spread across Harry's face.

With a wicked grin he turned to Remus, "please escort the bat back to her belfry."

"Harry show me your Wronski Feint." He shouted as he reached the lawn. Maybe he could pull this off; he was Sirius Black after all. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Title:** Precious & Fragile Things - Chapter Six (6/6)  
**Author:** Andrea88  
**Rating:** R for the general theme and sex**  
Pairing:** Sirius & Remus  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine, JKR's, I would treat them better  
**Summery:** Sirius returns from the beyond the veil, but paid a price.  
**Warnings:** It maybe angsty, It maybe icky. Some won't be pretty. **Spoilers for Half Blood Price **

**Precious & Fragile Things **

**Chapter Six  
**

_**Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift. That's why we call it the present. Babatunde Olatunji**_

"Protego," Sirius shouted. "Harry you need to be quicker. You gave me too much time to counter. I can also tell which spell you are about to cast, you are giving tells." 

"I know Sirius, I am trying." Harry concentrated and sent a jelly-legs jinx at Sirius.

"You have to do better." He raised his wand ready to send a jinx when he heard Remus laughing. "What," he asked turning to face the source of the laughter.

"I think you might want to fix that before you continue."

Sirius looked down and saw his legs wobbling uncontrollably. "Finite Incantatem," he wheeled around to face Harry. "Not bad and a good tactic to hit me at my weakest point."

"I'm sorry Sirius, I didn't mean to…"

Sirius cut him off, "no need to be sorry. In a real duel you have to use your opponents' weaknesses. Do you think the Death Eaters will be honorable?"

"No, they wouldn't."

"Then neither will you. Try again." Sirius raised his wand and waited for Harry to attack.

Remus watched the dueling practice and smiled. Sirius had made it his mission to train Harry in dueling. They practiced long hours everyday, Sirius was a great teacher. Remus could already see vast improvement in Harry's dueling technique. Even his non-verbal spells were improving. It was wonderful to see such life in Sirius again.

"I think its time to call it a night." Remus yawned to emphasize his point.

"Aww alright, good night Sirius." Harry ran over to his Godfather and gave him a hug. "Good night Remus," he said giving Remus a hug as well before he headed indoors.

"He's getting better," Sirius wheeled himself next to Remus.

"Yes he is, you are a great teacher." Remus held the door open for Sirius.

"Nah that would be you."

After showering and taking care of his needs, Sirius wheeled out of the bathroom. Remus' gaze was glued to the towel clad man before him. He watched as Sirius transferred to the bed, secretly hoping that there would be a wardrobe malfunction.

"Remus can you help me with my exercises?"

"Of course," Remus walked over and proceeded to help. He noticed that Sirius had not dried off properly. Wet hair clung to Sirius' face and neck. Damp skin begged to be tasted; it was too much for Remus. He wanted to touch and taste, but Sirius was still pushing him away. Granted, Sirius kissed him often but Remus wanted more. He knew he would have to wait until Sirius was ready, but his patience was wearing thin.

"That's enough exercise for tonight. I'm going to take a shower." He turned and quickly exited the room. A long hot shower and a silencing charm would do a world of good.

Sirius watched as Remus darted out the door. Having seen the bulge in Remus' trousers, he knew what the shower was for. His missed intimacy, but his parts didn't work. In time he would get used to it. Being alive and with his loved ones was a great gift. He was given a second chance and if the price was sex so be it. It couldn't be easy on Remus, maybe it was pity that kept him with Sirius. He tried not to think about anything remotely associated with sex, it was easier that way.

The next morning Sirius woke to find Remus gone. A note in the kitchen informed him that Remus was running errands. It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining, and Sirius decided to have his breakfast outside. The sun's warmth felt good against his skin. A familiar 'pop' announced a visitor.

"Hello Sirius, is Remus around?" Kingsley asked with hesitation.

"Hi Kingsley, no he's out." He eyed his visitor and grinned. He had an idea. "Have a seat, care for some tea?"

Kingsley was suspicious but sat down anyway. "What do you want Sirius?"

"I'm hurt why you would think I want something?" He tried looking as innocent as possible.

"I know that look, you're up to something."

Sirius bit his tongue; he wanted to know how Kingsley recognized his looks. The thought of Kingsley and Remus together made his stomach turn. That, however, was in the past and not important now.

Kingsley stared at Sirius. "Sirius, Remus and I were just good friends, nothing more." Sirius let out a sigh of relief. "After you fell he was devastated. I knew what he was going through and thought he needed someone to talk to. We became close, but, nothing physical ever evolved, our hearts belonged elsewhere."

"Thank you for being there for him." Sirius paused thinking about what Remus went through. "I am sorry for being a jealous idiot. I am just…" Sirius turned his attention to a crack in the patio floor. "I fear he'll leave me because of this," he indicated the wheelchair he was sitting in.

Kingsley laughed, "Don't underestimate Remus. He loves you; your condition doesn't change that." Kingsley shook his head, if Sirius only knew where Remus spent most of his days.

"Merlin, I miss the sex." Sirius poured some more tea and opted to add a shot Ogden's. "But I'm happy to just be back and with Remus and Harry."

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about sex Sirius, there are more important things." He added a shot of Ogden's to his tea. "Now, what did you want?"

Sirius began to tell Kingsley of his idea and what he needed his help for. Kingsley thought it was a great idea and agreed to help. They turned their heads as they heard another 'pop'.

"Wotcher, is Remus here?" Tonks said as she looked around trying to spot Remus.

"Sorry he's not here, anything I can help you with?" Sirius did his best to sound pleasant, while Kingsley bit back a laugh.

"Do you know where he went?"

"No, and I was just on my way out."

Kingsley stood and walked towards Tonks. "Are you ready Sirius?"

Sirius wheeled over to Kingsley, making sure to run over Tonks' feet.

"Ouch…"

"I am so sorry cousin; I am not good at working this yet." Smiling as Tonks apparated away, he did a wheelie and winked at Kingsley. "I know she's my cousin and all but she is getting on my nerves."

"I couldn't agree more." Kingsley grabbed a hold of Sirius and his chair, and they too apparated.

Sirius and Kingsley returned some time later with several bags in tow. Kingsley set them on the kitchen table, wished Sirius luck and apparated home. Sirius busied himself with the goods. He sent several into the bathroom.

Emptying the contents of the remaining bags on the kitchen table, Sirius figured out what else he needed. He used magic to open cabinets and send needed items to the table. Kingsley was to stall Remus until six o'clock. He didn't have that much time so magic would have to be used as well. Once everything was set and lovely aromas were wafting through the house; Sirius started the task of cleaning the house. He wanted everything perfect.

Sirius was feeling nostalgic so he put on some Sex Pistols to help the chores go by quicker. When everything was done he wheeled into the bathroom to shower and shave. He preferred shaving manually; it was a much closer shave that way. The cologne Kingsley picked out was excellent, he really had great taste.

Kingsley had picked out the clothes as well. They had been tailored to fit him. A fine pair of trousers, a nice white silk shirt, and to Kingsley's agreement no pants. Gazing into the mirror Sirius had to admit he looked good. If things were different he would certainly be shagging Remus tonight.

It was almost time for Remus to return. So Sirius changed the music to something more suitable for dinner, and opened a bottle of wine. Harry was the first to arrive. Seeing Sirius dressed up lifted his spirits, maybe things would work out after all. He washed up and helped set the table. Both sat there engaged in conversation when Remus arrived.

"What's going on," Remus acted surprised. He had known something was up when Kingsley met him and insisted on discussing Order business.

"I made a special 'thanks for putting up with me' dinner." Sirius pointed to a present on the table, "that is for you."

Remus opened the gift to find the finest Belgian chocolates. Eagerly he ripped open the box.

"Thank you Sirius," he said eyeing each one. Placing a dark truffle in his mouth, he slowly ran his tongue along the chocolate. His cheeks hollowed as he savored the melting treat. "I think I'll wash up before dinner."

He bent down and kissed Sirius. Sirius was lost in the kiss. Remus tasted of chocolate and memories of their youth flooded him.

Remus took a shower and dressed in his Sunday best. He would have to thank Kingsley, Sirius' cologne was enticing and he looked great in his new clothes. A few calming breaths and thoughts of Filch naked and he was ready to join the others.

Remus joined the others at the table and sipped his wine. Sirius flicked his wand and dinner appeared. Caesar salad, seared duck breast with orange and port sauce, roasted potatoes and asparagus filled the table. Dinner was spectacular and the conversation jovial. Harry grinned from ear to ear. He was elated that everything seemed normal again. They were all laughing and having a great time. The looks cast between Remus and Sirius made Harry think that things were headed in the right direction.

"That was delicious Sirius." Harry said as the last potato was eaten.

"I hope you have room for dessert!" Sirius cast a spell and bananas Foster flambé over French vanilla ice cream appeared on everyone's plate.

"I can't believe you made all this." Harry said shoving another spoonful in his mouth.

"Sirius is quite the cook."

"Yes, this is my first attempt at bananas Foster; I usually just made chocolate mousse." Remus' spoon hit the table with a loud clank. A slight blush forming as he remembered why that was his favorite.

Harry noticed that both Remus and Sirius had gone quiet and were blushing. He tried to imagine what was so special about chocolate mousse. His eyes went wide with the recollection that he really didn't need those types of visions stuck in his head.

"I'm stuffed I think I'll turn in early." Harry faked a yawn for emphasis. He figured they needed some time alone. "Dinner was excellent," Harry hugged both men good night and headed to his room.

"Dinner was superb Sirius, thank you." Remus leaned towards Sirius and kissed him.

"Thanks, I wanted to do something special for you. You deserve it." Sirius wanted nothing more than to kiss Remus again, but decided it was best not to. "I'll just clear the table and clean up, and then we can go to bed."

Remus cocked and eyebrow.

"I mean go to bed to sleep." Sirius said and quickly started to pile dishes in his lap. He avoided Remus' face, he did not want to see a look of disappointment, and the night had gone so well.

"Let me clean up, the cook shouldn't have to do the dishes." Remus took the plates from Sirius. "Oh no, you spilled some sauce on your new trousers." Remus grabbed a wet dish towel and proceeded to dab the stain.

"I'll take care of it," Sirius took the towel from Remus. "I'll just go and take a shower and get ready for bed." He turned quickly, not waiting for any protest from Remus, and headed to the bathroom.

Remus threw the dish towel into the sink in frustration.

Sirius undressed and transferred to his shower chair. Turning on the tap he let the hot water wash over him. Dinner had gone exceptionally well and if things were different Remus would be naked by now.

"Mmm you do look good wet."

Sirius turned to see Remus leaning against the wall.

"What are you doing in here?" Sirius felt self conscious as he felt Remus' gaze on him.

"Thought I'd take a shower as well, conserves water if we take it together." Remus started to take off his clothes.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Sirius swallowed hard as he saw Remus undress. He was just as beautiful as he remembered.

"And why's that," Remus asked as he stepped in the shower. "Merlin, you're gorgeous."

"No I'm not." Sirius tried to cover his legs, which had started to atrophy.

Straddling Sirius he looked him in the eye, "yes you are, every bit of you." He brushed his lips against Sirius'. Ghosting his lips over Sirius', pulling away when Sirius would try to kiss him more firmly. Teasing was so much fun.

Sirius snaked his arms around Remus' waist and pulled him closer. A naked Remus straddling him was always a good thing. Finally gaining entrance he deepened the kiss.

Remus was still forcing images of a naked Filch; he did not want to show his excitement just yet. This was no easy task considering he was straddling a naked Sirius who was a hell of a kisser. Reluctantly he broke the kiss, this wasn't about him, it was about Sirius.

Trailing kisses along his jaw, "Sirius, don't think, just feel."

Sirius nodded in response and did just that, he felt. He ran his hands along Remus' back. The feel of warm skin was intoxicating. He was surprised that something so simple could be so pleasurable, why hadn't he noticed this before?

Remus traced every inch of skin that Sirius could feel with his finger tips. He noticed a shiver when he caressed Sirius' neck. The shivering increased when Remus replaced his fingers with his mouth.

Nibbling on the ears caused Sirius to jolt. A soft moan escaped Remus, he loved seeing and feeling the reactions in his partner. Remus lovingly explored and noted every spot and every action that was pleasurable to Sirius.

Sirius was lost in the sensations Remus' ministrations were causing. He never thought he could feel this way again. His skin felt like it was on fire with each touch. The water running down his skin only heightened the experience. He looked at the flush on Remus' skin, felt the fast heart beat, heard the ragged breath and could smell the excitement. It was dizzying, he wanted more.

With every ounce of will he had Sirius pushed Remus off of him. Before Remus could even open his mouth to speak, Sirius pushed him against the shower wall. He leaned forward and took Remus inside. Merlin how he had missed this, every moan and every thrust of Remus' hips, fueled him further. As Remus came, Sirius wished he was buried deep inside him.

Sirius felt so alive. He watched as Remus regained his composure and straddled him again. He went after Sirius' most sensitive areas with vigor. The insides of the arms turned out to be very desirable for Sirius, causing him to moan.

Remus slid off his lap and knelt down. "Sirius I need you to look at me."

Sirius looked and saw Remus take him in his mouth. He opened his mouth to protest when he noticed that he was hard. Remus' hand never broke contact, always caressing one of Sirius' new erogenous zones.

It was intense seeing Remus suck him, his cheeks hollowing with each maneuver. It was almost as if Sirius was transferring what he saw to what he felt. And it felt amazing.

Settling back on his lap Remus leaned forward for a passionate kiss. He guided one of Sirius' hands to his backside and thrust the lube in the other. Without breaking the kiss, Sirius slicked his fingers and slowly pressed in. Their kisses became more frantic with each addition. Remus buried his fingers in Sirius' hair, gently massaging his scalp.

Sirius couldn't take it any more, he removed his fingers, "please Remus," was all he could say. It was enough. Remus lowered himself on to Sirius' arousal.

Sirius couldn't believe the pleasure he was feeling. Remus never stopped caressing him, his apt fingers sending him into a tailspin. It was such a feeling of euphoria, he felt like he was going to explode at any moment. He curled his hand along Remus' arousal and stroked. Their moans filled the air.

Sirius felt like electricity was running through his veins. Hearing Remus cry out as he came sent him over the edge. He remembered what it felt like and the thing Remus was doing to his ear made him cry out as well. He held Remus close, his head resting against his chest. He cried, he felt as if a tremendous weight had been lifted. Everything was going to be ok. Even if never walked again, he knew he could handle it with Remus by his side.

Outside the bathroom door Harry smiled. The moaning had woken him, but he didn't mind. It was just another sign that things were finally getting back to normal.

**_The End_**


End file.
